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notalwaysright_feedRead Not Bitter About The Butter
A woman is trying to return a 48-oz jar of peanut butter. She doesn't have a receipt, but the jar is unopened, so normally I could give her store credit. However, I have worked here for several years, and we have never sold that size of peanut butter.
notalwaysright_feed
Sister-In-Law: "Oh yeah, I just threw on an old movie. They love it."
My Wife: *Knowing our youngest can be a bit sensitive.* "Uh… what movie?"
Sister-In-Law: "It's one from when I was young. Don't worry; it's very family friendly."
My Wife: "That's great, but what movie?"
cakewrecks_feedBonjour, mon amis! Today's sweets are mostly inspired by Marie Antoinette, so you know what that means: Prepare your eyeballs for an over-the-top feast of excessiveness!
(And no, we won't be having any gruesome headless sweets commemorating Marie's rather gruesome end. Sheesh. Get your mind out of the guillotine.)
Yep, it's all decadence and girliness from here on out! And yay for that, because have I mentioned I've been helping my husband Matt at football camp all week? Yes, I've been sharing a house with 25 teenage boys for the last five days. I could use a little girliness up in here.
Fortunately this first beauty is a sight for my pink-deprived eyes:
And how appropriate that it includes a fabulous fondant fan, because I'm already feeling the need to fan myself!
[Swoon!] Such loveliness!
And here's the lady of the hour herself...
By CakeCentral member Lindasuus
...sweetly putting to shame every Barbie-torso-stuffed-in-a-cake ever made.
This one is so absolutely flawless and stunning, I'm convinced it doesn't really exist.
By Cake Coquette (More detail shots at the link)
We've all just collectively dreamed it or something. (We have excellent imaginary taste, you and I!)
Now here's a solution to that pesky problem of how to hide plastic cake pillars: Simply pipe a decorative cage of icing between the tiers for an elaborate camouflaging exoskeleton of awesomeness!
Er, on second thought, you might want to just leave that to the pros.
I thought this Fabergé Egg cake was a winner on its own ... (Seriously, doesn't it look like a 1st place trophy to you? Or is that the football camp talking?)
...but then I scrolled down and realized the egg was only one quarter of the whole cake!
Wow. The layers look like carved marble or porcelain, and I love those unique shapes, too. It's hard to believe the tiers wouldn't shatter when you went to cut a slice!
I think more food should be adorned with edible pink tassels, don't you?
I love this color scheme so much; fun, flirty, and fit for a queen. I bet ol' M.A. would lose her head over it!
Oooh, sorry Marie. Too soon?
Submitted by Anne Marie B. and made by Rosey Confectionary Sugar Art
Oh, don't stare at me with that doleful expression. Turn your attention instead to the amazing miniature dessert table in your boudoir. And hey, is that rug edible too? Incredible.
Here comes another amazing egg cake. I'm not really sure if fancy eggs are a Marie Antoinette thing, but they're both similarly lavish, so it works for me.
Just gorgeous. If I was serving this cake, I don't think I'd let them eat it, youknowwhatI'msayin?
(Like "Let them eat cake?" Marie's famous line? You know? Yes? Never mind.)
This is probably my favorite cake today:
Submitted by Devon C; by Cake Opera Co.
I thought it was Marie masquerading as a... um... masquerader, while holding a kangaroo for fun, but the website informs me that this is actually an 18th century French figurine, masked to conceal her illicit rendezvous, and juxtaposed by the fawn in her arms meant to represent birth and innocence.
So, I was close.
All of these fanciful confections make me want to host a Marie Antoinette party! How about you? Here's a checklist of everything we need:
Powdered wigs, macarons, frilly shoes, masks, more fancy eggs (I guess they really are a thing) tiny top hats, (pretty sure that's NOT a thing, but I'll go with it), and of course, cake!
Does this cake remind you of a hot-air balloon, too?
Submitted by Promise W. and made by Ganache Patisserie
And did you know that the first manned hot-air balloon ride took place in front of Marie Antoinette and the French court? And that it was "manned" by a sheep, a rooster, and a duck?
True story.
Here's another one: this cake is fantastic! Do you see the little movie-scene applique? Too cool.
I'm not sure how inspired by Marie Antoinette this final cake is, but it's incredible. At over three feet tall and almost two feet wide, I'm pretty sure this is the cake they serve you when you die and go to heaven:
Oh, wait. Actually this is the signature cake for the Hilton Hotel in Silver Spring. Which, after a week at football camp, sounds enough like heaven to me.
Happy Sunday!
*****
If today's Sweets are right up your style alley, then I have JUST the tea for you:
This blend is made in France using the roses and apples grown in the Versailles palace garden. Omigosh! If that's not tea fit for royal-tea, I don't know what is. Plus it comes in that gorgeous pink tin. Talk about a perfect gift for any tea-lover.
******
And from my other blog, Epbot:
notalwaysright_feedRead Hello From The Other Side
It's the first good spring-weather weekend of the year, and OF COURSE my husband is in bed sick with bad stomach pain and a terrible headache, and OF COURSE a batch of kids is now outside, running up and down the sidewalk in front of our windows, making everything worse. I toss on some shoes and head outside.
Me: "Hey, guys!"
notalwaysright_feedRead Vapid Vaping
A customer walks in, takes one look around, and immediately starts vaping. It's a big cloud and smells like peach and burnt battery.
Me: "Sir, we don’t allow smoking or vaping in the store."
Customer: "It’s not smoking. It’s vaping. Different!"
Read Vapid Vaping
notalwaysright_feedMy husband was going to put virus protection on my new Ipad. Husband “I need your passcode” Before I could answer our son chimes in Son “Haha,you probably don’t even remember do you? We told you to write it down.” Me *prattles off six numbers. Son “How did you remember that?} Husband “it’s probably got […]
notalwaysright_feedI mod for streamers on Twitch and on Discord. While most of them are smaller, community game-focused streamers, one was a partner who built up a community playing community games and being a safe, open, and caring place to hang out in. Every Friday, they would do an Afterhours hangout in Discord after that day’s […]
notalwaysright_feed(We’re using a church sanctuary for a dance rehearsal. One of my castmates, his girlfriend, and I are the first people to walk into the sanctuary and the lights are still out.) Me: (jokingly) Let there be light! (The lights immediately flicker on.) Castmate: Whoa. (to his girlfriend) [My name] is magical! (The girlfriend stared […]
notalwaysright_feedThis takes place when I’m a preteen, over several years. When I was around six, a level 3 sex offender moved onto my street. My mom was very diligent in warning me and my two younger brothers to stay far, far away from him. Flash forward to me taking swimming lessons. I get through level […]
notalwaysright_feedI’m the customer. I’ve just gone on a food assistance program, and when I get my card I haven’t eaten for days. There are premade foods including burritos. Some are cold and some are under a heat lamp, but otherwise the exact same. It’s winter so I take the warm one. The cashier won’t sell […]
notalwaysright_feedRead Produce-ing A Fine Young Worker
I was just restocking bell peppers when I noticed a kid, couldn’t have been more than seventeen, standing by the zucchinis. They looked overwhelmed.
Me: "You okay there?"
Young Customer: "I, uh… I just needed, like… food. Real food. But I don’t know what half this stuff even is."
notalwaysright_feedRead Wine-ing And Winding Down For Bed
I’m scanning items when a little boy, maybe five, helps unload the cart with surprising efficiency.
Me: "Wow, you’re such a good helper for Mommy!"
Boy: *Dead serious.* "I have to! Mommy says she has to get home for wine o'clock!"
notalwaysright_feedRead And When Everyone Is Super, No One Will Be
Me: "Sir, there's a line."
Customer: "I preordered the deluxe edition. I shouldn’t have to wait like the rest of them."
Me: "So did all of them."
Customer: "No, I said the deluxe edition."
notalwaysright_feed - Not Bitter About The Butternotalwaysright_feed - The NeverEnding Traumacakewrecks_feed - Sunday Sweets: C'est Bon!notalwaysright_feed - Hello From The Other Sidenotalwaysright_feed - Vapid Vapingnotalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - Produce-ing A Fine Young Workernotalwaysright_feed - Wine-ing And Winding Down For Bednotalwaysright_feed - And When Everyone Is Super, No One Will Benotalwaysright_feed - (no subject)![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}